My (Accidental) Colombian Boyfriend: Colombia Week 3
- Kjerstin Roberts
- Jan 20, 2020
- 8 min read
As time went on in Colombia, I settled into a pretty good routine. I went to work in the mornings before chilling at home on the porch for a few hours. There wasn't a ton to do right around where I lived because I was in a fairly suburban part of Cartagena. Life was honestly quite mellow, but I definitely enjoyed it.
Day 1
This week still starts out in Santa Marta. Rosie and I wandered around downtown Santa Marta all morning. We ate breakfast at a farmers market near a beautiful white chapel. We explored the library, which has a massive mural supporting the man who helped Cuba gain its independence.
In the afternoon, we took the "bus" (aka van) back to Cartagena. This bus was different because it picked everyone who wasn't a tourist up from their home. This meant the journey was significantly longer than it need to be. Oh well! By the time we got home, I was absolutely exhausted. I slept like the dead that night.
Day 2
I worked all morning before taking some time for myself in the afternoon. Weekend trips are amazing, but it is quite easy to tire yourself out. You go from doing all sorts of stuff nonstop to throwing yourself back into work. This can make you tired really easily in my experience. Because of this, I spent the day at home just chilling out. I read two books. I was on a social media fast, as requested by President Russell M. Nelson of my church. During our general conference over the weekend, he had asked all members to take a break from their social media and get in contact with what was really important to them. I've periodically kept this habit up when I feel myself getting sucked back in too much.
That night, I made a dish called papas rellenas (filled potatoes) with my host mom Marcela. To make these, you essentially make mashed potatoes and fill them. To fill them, you add in pico de gallo, chiles, spices, and and ground beef. Then you wrap this mixture into the mashed potatoes that you've already made. Once that process is done, you fry the ball of potatoes. Honestly, this is still one of my favorite foods because it is absolutely delicious. In the video I've included of this, you can also see me blatantly flirting with Jesus, which became a real thing during the whole time I lived in Cartagena.
Day 3
We did some crafts at school that day. To help with motor skills, we learned how to bunch tissue paper together and then glue them onto a piece of paper in a certain pattern. I loved getting to help the kids and overall just seeing what they could do. Mostly I think kids are the most exciting people around and I love them so much.
After lunch, I changed the kids' clothes and took everyone to the bathroom. For the first time ever, the kids began to trust me. Some of them even asked me to lay down on the mats with them so they could sleep. Honestly, they are the cutest little things. When we all laid down, they just wanted to snuggle and be with me. They eventually all fell asleep, and, to be honest, I almost fell asleep too, which is hilarious. It turns out that I definitely need a nap time as well.
After work, I had a super low key afternoon before heading over to Libardo and Rosie's house. It was Libardo's 21st birthday, and we were ready to help him celebrate. By the time I got there around 6 with Cristhian, Libardo and his friend Jose were already quite drunk. I had met Jose a few weeks earlier when we all went out to a bar together. He's Venezuelan and loved to hit on Rosie as much as possible. I thought that was hilarious because Rosie had a boyfriend and made sure to mention him quite a lot, but Jose never stopped trying.
For Libardo's birthday, we just stayed around his house on the actual day because it was a Tuesday. He had a bunch of friends over, and they drank a TON, which is pretty on par with any mildly special occasion in Colombia. We also had super loud music on the whole time, including the weirdest remix of Ed Sheeran's "Shape of You" that I have ever heard. It was an adventure. I finally made it home with Cristhian late that night.
Day 4
The next day was pretty typical. I worked all morning before coming home to a delicious lunch. I took pictures of my food on occasion, and I figured I better share a little bit about the typical kinds of food I ate when I lived in Colombia.
Colombians eat a medium-sized breakfast, a large lunch, and a small dinner. According to a lot of health experts, this is a really healthy way to eat. All I know is that I always lose weight when I'm abroad. A lot of that may come from me having set portions, walking everywhere, and sweating constantly because there's no temperature regulation, but I'm sure some of it can be attributed to this as well. The meal photo I've attached has an entire fried fish, coconut rice, boiled yuca, and an onion, avocado, and tomato salad. I got used to eating whole fried fish pretty quickly while in Colombia. I actually quite enjoy the super salty skin. The one downside is sometimes accidentally eating a bone, but that can't be helped for the most part.
After lunch, I ended up napping away nearly the entire afternoon. When I finally woke up, I went on a long walk with Jesus. He said he was trying to get more exercise. He must have been really out of shape because that hour and a half actually did make him sweat. I mostly did it because I was bored and looking for something fun to do. I loved spending time with him. When I think back to my memories of Colombia, he is always one of the first things I think of. What a guy! We ended up talking nonstop the whole time. I actually thought he was going to kiss me at one point, but he didn't end up trying it. I would have let him. One of my favorite things about him was his willingness to always hang out with me and show me the unique things about himself, his culture, and the places right around home. He was such a good guy.
Day 5
It rained all day. When it rains, most Colombians don't like to leave their houses if at all possible. Everything kind of shuts down. It's hard to get anywhere because most taxis don't want to take you anywhere. Sometimes you will request a place to go and they will flat out say no and drive off to go pick up someone else. It's wild. My least favorite part of the rain, however, was at the school. When it rained, all the kids would stay inside, and we would just watch movies for hours. This made me want to scream, especially when all we would watch was Masha y el Oso. YouTube it at your own risk. I can still hear the stupid theme music.
Once at home, I sat outside on our porch for hours. The apartment above ours also had a porch, so you could sit out and really appreciate the rain without getting wet, unless you wanted to. I loved it.
That night, the US played Colombia in professional soccer. I cheered for the US while Jesus and all his friends who came over cheered for Colombia. The US ended up losing 4-2. I didn't really care, but it was fun to pretend to pout about the loss.
My favorite part of the night came when everyone thought I was Jesus' girlfriend. He and I were sitting quite close to each other on the couch and apparently that's what everyone assumed. No one knew I was from the US and just there to volunteer. Marcela eventually set the record straight, but it was too late. Everyone thought I was Jesus' girlfriend for real. I wasn't mad about it.
Day 6
I spent all day on Friday lying in bed. I woke up around 1:30am to throw up and spent the whole night vomiting. Apparently, one of Jesus' friends had brought some chocolate cake that had been made with some unfiltered water or something. I was violently ill the whole day and couldn't go into work. On the plus side, I did take the nude I am most proud of, even to this day. I will not be attaching this photo for obvious reasons, but one day, my husband is gonna get a picture of me looking great from October 2018. It turns out getting sick really helps you lose all the weight you want to. Who knew?!?
Day 7
Luckily, I recovered from my sickness rather quickly. The next morning, I slept in and then left for El Centro, the historic district, with Rosie. We spent the afternoon wandering through the various shops there and just exploring everything within the high walls of the Old City. We also picked up a bunch of postcards to write and send to family and friends back home.
Before the sun went down, we made sure we were positioned perfectly to watch the sunset. I've attached a picture facing both the ocean and the new part of Cartagena. Pretty much all of Cartagena is under 5 stories, except the super touristy part of Cartagena you'll see in the picture. It's a real juxtaposition from what the normal Cartagena looks like.
On the way home from El Centro, Rosie and I decided to take the public bus because we knew it would be much cheaper than taking a taxi. The bus took us 1.5 hours to get home, rather than a 40 minute taxi ride. It was an experience. They also don't have maximums for the amount of people on the bus and will pack you in until you almost can't breathe. The buses in Cartagena also don't have any stops. When you see something familiar, you scream "PARADA" (stop) as loudly as possible. The bus driver will pull over ASAP and let you out. It was quite an experience, and not one I'm sure I'd like to repeat, though it was much cheaper than a taxi would have been.
When we got home, we changed as quickly as humanly possible before heading to a club with Libardo for his birthday. We met up with these super hot Colombian chicks there. I seriously have no idea how all 20 year old Colombians are so beautiful and wildly skinny. They were all stunning.
We danced the night away in a (shockingly) air-conditioned club. Colombians are nuts on the dance floor. People were legitimately grinding on the floor with no regard for the fact that we were in public. I'm fairly certain I saw someone get pregnant. It was wild. Rosie and I spent a lot of time outside just to avoid the raunchiness of the indoors. I was lucky enough to be able to beg off early because I had been sick the day before. I made my way home around 2am and was very grateful to be out of the wild club. I wouldn't recommend the experience.
Life Lessons
Don't go to a club unless you're prepared to be a voyeur.
Don't eat chocolate cake.
Kids are really stinking cute.
Go for long walks with your not-boyfriend, become really close, and then confuse everyone around you about your relationship status just because you can.
Always take nudes when you're skinny and hot while you're sick.
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